Things I am learning

1. Sometimes life feels like this. It's okay. It happens to everyone. 2. If you wait patiently, give thanks, and ask the Lord for help, eventually you will feel more like this:

3. Marriage is hard. That fact is also okay. I used to think that admitting that was like saying that you didn't like your kids, you just shouldn't do it. But I am changing my mind. I am thinking about worthwhile things and realizing they dont come easy. Living a life worthy of the calling I have recieved is not necessarily easy, but it is worth doing. I am not saying that marriage is always hard, at least a good one shouldn't be. But there are rare moments when just getting along feels like a knock down dragout fight. It becomes hard to be nice and loving. When these moments come I am reminded of something. There is more than just me at stake. I have an enemy that prowls around seeking to steal, kill and destroy. Happy families are God's purpose for us, and the devil does not want us to have them. So the enemy will use any of my weak emotions to try to divide us. I am trying to learn to recognize this, and in the moments that are hard - to realize that sometimes I have to fight. I have to fight to enter into grace, forgiveness and letting go. I have to fight to be vulnerable in spite of wounds and let love abound. This is a fight worth taking up. (by the way - I realize my initial statement is slightly dramatized for interst catching flair. In reality, what I would say is, "Marriage can be difficult." but that doesn't sound nearly as earth shattering as, "Marriage is hard")

4. Sweeping and mopping the floors in near darkness is very relaxing, however , highly inefficient.

5.When a 3 year old is preparing to join you for naptime after just playing outside for 2 hours, do not believe him in his assertion that his pants are clean, even after doing a cursory visual inspection. If you do you will come to regret it as he lies next to you in a horizontal position and then asks, "what's this mommy" as a cascade of sand empties out of his pockets onto your freshly washed egyptian cotton sheets. You may at this point vaccume your sheets for the first time in history and try to get your husband not to complain about sleeping on this side of the bed.

6. If there are 3,896 plastic toys, vehicles meant for children to ride on, and other safe play objects in the backyard, boys will still manage to find the one object than can cause imminent

danger or likely death.

7. If you ever let children taste anything yummy that you eat, even once, they will never forget. They will not forget the carton, bottle or box that it comes in and will be able to recognize it at once and immidiately begin begging. This also applies to stores housing yummy things, such as ice creams parlors and the like. That is why it is best to occasionally go to Starbucks with the children and intentionally order black coffee or plain green tea specifically for them to taste. This should allow several trips where you can order venti mocha frappacinnos without begging.

8. If your house stinks, it means you should clean it.

9. If you are so tired that all you can do is walk around the house crying, you should go to bed.

10. Be careful who you judge, for you do not know everything. I will admit that I have been judgemental towards certain people groups in the past. I am now repentant. One of those people groups may or may not have been families with large numbers of boys living in the house. I may have visited their bathrooms and gasped in abject horror. I may have wondered why these bathrooms smelled like a barn - or worse. I admit, I came from a mostly one child home growing up. This child was me and I was a girl. We were also of a Scandinavian decent, where cleanliness was next to godliness. I did not understand. Now, when I scour my entire bathroom, top to bottom, with bleach and walk in 10 minutes later to find urine sprayed over the whole toilet, walls and floor, I understand. Boys are not helpful when it comes to fresh smelling bathrooms.

11. If you are sad and you eat to feel better, it will not help. Unless of course the food is chocolate, which will be mildly effective. OR unless the food is actually a drink consisting of tea or coffee with a friend, which will prove vastly more effective than chocolate eaten alone. OR unless the food is a homebaked good fresh from the oven made with love, specifically with the intention to bring joy to all who eat it. OR unless the food is a home cooked meal, thoughtfully prepared as a meaniful gift of love. OR unless the food is prepared by a professional and is eaten away from home and without children as a time to reconnect with your husband.

12. Messy situations do not get better when left to time alone. A stong resolve, an antiseptic, and pair of heavy gloves are much more effective. If not tended to quickly they will only cause undue chafing and unnecessary drama. (I am still learning this one)

13. Underware are optional. This seems to apply even to Bob the Builder underware.

14. If it comes down to choosing between the two, it is better to have a happy heart than a clean house.

15. Your job as a parent is to help your children reach milestones, yet when you suceed, some of these milestones will not always bring a thrill to your heart. For example : learning to open the refridgerator, reaching on tops of countertops, unlocking doors, dressing themselves, learning to speak, mimicking you (ouch this one can hurt).

16. I am not in contol of the universe. I cannot even control the small, underage, impressionable members of my own household.

17. Life goes by fast, these moments are precious, and I should not waste my years in worry. So what if my husband puts my son in the car without shoes and hair sticking up everywhere and we walk through the bank looking like ragamuffins. So what if my chair's crevices are full of unknown goo and it may be immovable. So what if our rug now has more sand in it that carpet fibers. I have two of the most adorable blond headed babies known to the earth and a husband who adores me. We are healthy and happy. God has been good to me.