Good\ Tiimes
I find mothering to be the single most difficult yet rewarding experience of my life. I continually feel like a novice, a failure, attempting my best to make it up as I go along. God has given me responsibility for other human beings. It is amazing and humbling all at once.
This week what I learned from a mothering class was how to help our children express, understand and walk through their emotions. The mother (and grandmother) teaching the class shared a wealth of wisdom. What I realized through her speaking was that we are teaching our children big things in life. Sometimes I forget that I am not just dealing with another stolen army man or tending to yet another brother-inflicted battle injury, I am teaching little men how to process and deal with major emotions in life: hurt, pain and frustration. These things are important life lessons. It is good for me to remember that I'm not just dealing with property rights for some token plastic toy, but rather instilling greater values such as justice, empathy and selflessness. At least trying to. For the most part I still feel like an ill-equipped referee whose whistle has ceased to function.
The good news is that every once and awhile I get a glimmer of hope. We go to a class and when I pick up the boys I get rave reviews about how wonderful they are. Really, these boys here? The ones with the straggly hair and the peanut butter encrusted faces? They were good? Praise the Lord, maybe they are secretly learning something when I'm in the shower. Heaven knows that whenever I am around all they do is invent games where they injure each other and take turns fighting over who won.
In between all the battles and arguing there are peanut butter hugs, snotty-nosed kisses, unexpected snuggles of the knee, write-my-own valentines dictated by a loving son, brotherly laughter, baby squishes, shouts of glee, uncontainable excitement and fascinating wonder filling each new day. Life is good.
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The other day Judah was concerned when Titus injured his toe. This got him to thinking. He asked his dad, "Can you walk if your legs get cut off?" When Titus said that you couldn't, Judah was not dejected. Instead he replied optimistically, "But you can still bounce!" and then he proceeded to give a demonstration of what it might look like if one were to bounce without any legs.
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Four year olds, in my brief experience, seem to be the cutest of all for saying adorable things. The other day I had to chastise Judah for his efforts in helping his brother climb the stairs. Asher has been climbing the stairs in recent days (in spite of my fervent attempts to stop him) . the other day I kept putting him on the other side of the room but when I turned my back he was already on the stairs. I finally figured out that he was not Houdini, he was just getting help from Judah.
I then told Judah that he was not to aide or abet Asher in stair climbing (the guy is only 8 months old after all). I explained how babies were soft and delicate and that if Asher fell down the stairs he could get hurt. Judah asked if he could break. I said he could. Judah then wanted to know, "What happens if you break a baby?" I was thinking of how to respond when he continued, "Do you go to jail?"
And how do you think I answered him?
Comments
Where is this "mothering class" by the way? I think I need one.