Humble #9

"who fed you in the wilderness with manna that your fathers did not know, that he might humble you and test you, to do you good in the end." Deuteronomy8:16

I've often had people tell me that they think that I am full of grace. I translate that as "you have been humbled, indeed.", because God gives grace to the humble.

There is nothing more humbling than being needy. God talks about humbling the Israelites by feeding them with manna. They were literally dependent on God to stay alive. Not only that, but God didn't allow them to store up his manna, it had to be gathered each day. Their dependence on him was paramount.

But this he says, he did to, "do you good in the end."

I think of Paul who was given the "thorn in his flesh" which he pleaded with God to remove from him. But God said his grace was sufficient. He was allowing Paul to live in a place of depending on his grace.

This sounds so beautiful, and even glamourous when it is happening to someone else. Even as I envision Paul's situation, it's in bright cartoon colors and all very animated. It's not painful or brutal - or worse - humiliating.

But then it comes to my own life. I have a struggle that I just can't seem to knock. And what do I hear God saying, "Yes that's there. I see it. But come to me. Don't worry about ridding yourself of that problem, only I can do that. Focus on me. Depend on me. Need me. Be helpless without me. You already are, anyhow."

So just like manna from heaven, I depend upon God's daily grace. I can not be good enough, strong enough, smart enough. But that was never the point. The point is, can I learn to depend upon the source that never runs dry. Can I subsist on the Bread of Life, that I get to take no credit for? Can I rest in the peace that I did nothing to deserve?

Today, I think I can. His grace is sufficient for me.

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