Adventures in Toddlerland
When you have toddlers you wonder if you have mental problems. You clean the whole kitchen to a state of gleaming perfection and then you turn around. When you glace at it a moment later it looks like the contents of an entire closet vomited. They did, via, the 2 year old.
The great thing about toddlers though, is they help you not take life too seriously. You think you have a 10:00am appointment? Ha! They have planned a massive poop explosion. You think you will go to bed early and catch up on some rest. Ha! They decide it's the right time to practice nocturnal escape maneuvers and whole house screaming exercises. You think you'll get up 2 hours earlier than usual to have a moment of solitude. As you noiselessly creep out of your room, who do you see sitting on the landing wearing a look of glee? You guessed it, the hilarious toddler.
I think that children are a gift from God because they help us easily fulfill the mandate to store up our treasures in heaven. All my stuff here on earth looks like crap. It looks like it's been run through by a herd of goats or run over by a lawnmower. In the case of a fork I found this week, it actually was run over by the lawnmower.
This is good new in a society besot by materialism. It helps us not hold too tightly to earthly goods when our children keep dropping them in the garbage disposal. I number the passing years by the amount of new butter dishes I have to buy.
Fellow parents of toddlers, take heart, I know that you actually cleaned your house 5 minutes ago, even though it looks like a hurricane just ripped through. Parents of grown children, I remind you to enjoy the way you don't trip over the broom on the floor every time you walk through the kitchen. To those with no children, have grace for us with toddlers. Just because we can't complete a sentence in conversation or our bathrooms are cringe worthy (we promised we cleaned them once - you just can't tell), don't give up on us. I promise, this too shall pass.
If you see one of those hilarious, often chubby faced, people with the short legs and tall personality, take a moment to hold their still-soft cheeks in your palm and know that their angelic toddler face is likely causing terror, destruction and mental instability in someone's life.
The great thing about toddlers though, is they help you not take life too seriously. You think you have a 10:00am appointment? Ha! They have planned a massive poop explosion. You think you will go to bed early and catch up on some rest. Ha! They decide it's the right time to practice nocturnal escape maneuvers and whole house screaming exercises. You think you'll get up 2 hours earlier than usual to have a moment of solitude. As you noiselessly creep out of your room, who do you see sitting on the landing wearing a look of glee? You guessed it, the hilarious toddler.
I think that children are a gift from God because they help us easily fulfill the mandate to store up our treasures in heaven. All my stuff here on earth looks like crap. It looks like it's been run through by a herd of goats or run over by a lawnmower. In the case of a fork I found this week, it actually was run over by the lawnmower.
This is good new in a society besot by materialism. It helps us not hold too tightly to earthly goods when our children keep dropping them in the garbage disposal. I number the passing years by the amount of new butter dishes I have to buy.
Fellow parents of toddlers, take heart, I know that you actually cleaned your house 5 minutes ago, even though it looks like a hurricane just ripped through. Parents of grown children, I remind you to enjoy the way you don't trip over the broom on the floor every time you walk through the kitchen. To those with no children, have grace for us with toddlers. Just because we can't complete a sentence in conversation or our bathrooms are cringe worthy (we promised we cleaned them once - you just can't tell), don't give up on us. I promise, this too shall pass.
If you see one of those hilarious, often chubby faced, people with the short legs and tall personality, take a moment to hold their still-soft cheeks in your palm and know that their angelic toddler face is likely causing terror, destruction and mental instability in someone's life.
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