LIfe
Life is not always pretty. Sometimes you find yourself wandering around with your hair sticking out in countless directions with snot running down your nose and your eyes red and puffed up to an unrecognizable state. Your son may even ask you, "What happened to your face, Mom?" This is life.
I don't want it to be. I want to be strong and capable, just like anyone, I imagine. I would like to be put together. But I am not. I am a mess. I know it's okay, but I still don't like it.
While I want to be feel better, I sort of don't. Being sad about my daughter connects me to her somehow. I don't want to let her go, even though I know I have to.
I have words and thoughts and emotions running across the screen of my brain and it is starting to get messy, like retyping repeatedly on the same line. I am confused and I don't understand.
And then, just now, the doorbell rang. Just in time, a box of lovely flowers here to pull me from my wallowing in self pity. I sobbed as I opened them. I am loved. Even if my hair does stick out in a hundered directions and tears and snot comingle running down my face, even though I am merely human, I am still loved. (Thanks Caleb and Kendra)
I don't want it to be. I want to be strong and capable, just like anyone, I imagine. I would like to be put together. But I am not. I am a mess. I know it's okay, but I still don't like it.
While I want to be feel better, I sort of don't. Being sad about my daughter connects me to her somehow. I don't want to let her go, even though I know I have to.
I have words and thoughts and emotions running across the screen of my brain and it is starting to get messy, like retyping repeatedly on the same line. I am confused and I don't understand.
And then, just now, the doorbell rang. Just in time, a box of lovely flowers here to pull me from my wallowing in self pity. I sobbed as I opened them. I am loved. Even if my hair does stick out in a hundered directions and tears and snot comingle running down my face, even though I am merely human, I am still loved. (Thanks Caleb and Kendra)
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